wow. talk about not knowing where to start...
um, it's back! ha! seriously, is it just me, or does it feel like it's been on hiatus for YEARS instead of months? it was a little surreal watching it just now, i must admit. i'll also admit to cheating on PR with that craptastic spin off, the fashion show. now that show was b-a-d, but of course i watched every single episode. even tho at first, all i could think of was, oh man, this poor people's version of project runway sucks ASS. and why is kelly rowland considered qualified to judge? because girlfriend has been rockin' house of dereon clothes for the past ten years. and we all know that the house of dereon belongs one place and one place only, and that's the fox hills mall! and moreover, doesn't issac mizrahi design clothes for f***ing target? TARGET? and y'all know much i LOVE target... meh!
but then see what happens? the good reality tv show about fashion designers goes away, and you have to settle for the bad reality tv show about fashion designers. then next thing you know, you are used to the bad reality tv show about fashion designers, so when the good reality tv show about fashion designers comes back on, you think, oh this lifetime version of 'the fashion show' sucks ASS.
but y'all know that i will watch (and blog) about project runway until the bitter end, so let's get started.
i think i've mentioned this before, but since it's been seven years since last season ended i'll mention it again: i take notes. it makes it a lot easier to write about, and sometimes the notes are just funny in and of themselves. because as we've already discussed, my brain is like a bad neighborhood ~ you don't want to go in there alone.
note #1: "house is rad! looks like the next season of the real world." sooooooo much nicer, isn't it? they must have twice the production budget they had before. then i remembered that they were in downtown LA now, not NYC. then i also remembered that the production company that does the real world is also doing this. ahhhhh, check.
note #2: "logan = fuckin' BABE." he better make it until fashion week! i don't care WHAT his clothes look like. he could design crap like suede did last season and i'd still want him to win. *swoon*
note #3: "weho meth snorter - shocking." actually, he never said if he was a snorter or smoker (or mainliner), but i'm going to guess smoker, despite what my notes say. and talk about a stereotype (gay guy addicted to meth)... yep, this is definitely being produced (casted?) by the real world peeps.
note #4: "yugoslavian tranny." well no need to restate the obvious.
note #5: "asian guy with an 80's mullet & tail. wtf?" see above.
note #6: "nicolas: 'chiffon, lace, feathers & champagne!' ugh. totally gay." and as a side note, did you happen to see him during judging? he had that crazy serial killer look going on, and he also had some major sweat beads. tho i guess it wouldn't be project runway without a serial killer now, would it? i can also tell that he's totally going to suck. not so much because he's known for designing with chiffon, lace, feathers & champagne, but because he seemed really proud of it. loser.
note #7: "mitchell. looks like a cuter perez hilton. totally gay." hmmm, i sense a theme emerging.
note#8: "bob marley." you thought the same thing, right!?!? i totally know that you did.
note #9: "mia farrow in rosemary's baby." jeez. i was ok with her actually, up until she said she didn't sketch and decided to do a handstand instead. freak. and wtf was up with her outfit? it looked like a box of crayons threw up on her. i already knew her stuff was going to suck, simply based on these two things alone. and sure enough, freaky mc freakster sends her model down the runway looking like a spaceship. auf wiedersehen, mia. don't let the door hit you on the way out!
note #10: "dynasty? falcon's crest? or wait. ABBA." i was highly suspicious of this girl when i saw her. she does NOT look like a designer. she looks like a whorebag. omg, she better not hit on logan!! oh she is totally going to. slut.
so apparently those were the noteworthy peeps in my mind. now on to the actual show.
what is up with all of the crying!!?!? first the crack baby was sobbing like an 8-year old to tim gunn, and tim was suddenly playing concerned child psychologist, and i'm thinking wtf is this? i don't want to see this! if i want to see crying and drama i have 'daisy of love' and 'america's best dance crew' and plenty of other shitty shows to watch, thanks. then that guy that won couldn't keep it together either. i'm over both of them already. as people. but their dresses weren't that bad. i actually liked the winning dress. but i'm not sure it was worth all of the drametia.
OF COURSE lindsay lohan was the guest judge! the real world producers put yet another stamp on this season. which means that paris hilton is next week, and maybe britney the week after that... gee, i bet each week will be just like reading tmz! but seriously, it katie price shows up one week i'm going to have a coronary. (unless she's judging the drag queen costume challenge, that is. because that would be RAD.)
and ok, further proof that it has been a loooooong time in between seasons: michael kors and nina garcia look all kinds of beat up. queen kors alone was wearing enough make up to sink a ship!!! and the scary part is that bravo is in HD, lifetime is not. which means that he probably looks ten times worse in real life than he does on the show. yikes. however, i must say that i was pleased that he was staying true to having one "shitty not funny" comment each week. and this week there were two! bonus! first, re: mitchell's scary see-through dress (which my notes, btw, say, oh lindsey is going to love this one ~ and apparently i was right) "instead of the red carpet, she looks like she should be in her house next to the fire sipping a brandy!" and then this quote re: mia farrow's spaceship, which i'm sure you recall because it was f***ing awesome: "she looks like a disco soccer ball. meh!"
yay! clap clap!!!
so even though i was totally underwhelmed by the clothes, i was pleased with MK's snarky commentary, and of course by the fact that there is a total babe for once. one who might even be straight. yep, this is definitely being produced by some MTV peeps for SURE.
until next week, amigos...
t$
No comments:
Post a Comment